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Odelia found herself staring at the Coke can, and more specifically Emerald’s face. “So how do I prove that you’re the one?” she muttered.

Chapter 37

I wasn’t entirely happy with the role I’d been given in this, Odelia’s idea for finally figuring out if Emerald was the person who’d killed her colleague. And I could tell that Dooley wasn’t too thrilled with her idea either.

Harriet, on the other hand, was super-excited. Not only had she discovered the telling clue—the one clue that ruled them all, so to speak—but she’d been cast for a vital role in the next part of the drama. Brutus, of course, felt that his part was the most important one, and didn’t stop reminding us of this.

“Look at it this way, guys,” he said, spreading himself on the foot of the bed as if he owned it. “There are fighters in this world, and then there are pussies. You guys,” he said, indicating me and Dooley, “are pussies, and so are you, darling,” he added with a smile to Harriet. “Butin a good way.”

“Thanks, sugar plum,” she cooed.

“Let me guess,” I said. “And you’re a fighter, right?”

“You got it, Maxie, baby. I’ve got the strength, I’ve got the speed, and I’ve got the stamina to see this thing through. You guys, on the other hand, do not.” He poked my belly. “Will you look at that? Pure flab. And you,” he said, touching Dooley’s non-existent belly, “skin and bones. Now feel my belly. Go on, give it a poke.”

I gave him a very enthusiastic poke that made him wince.

“Feel that?” he said. “Pure muscle. Human males may boast about their six-pack abs, but I’ve got them all beat. I’ve got twelve-pack abs!”

“Twelve-pack abs?” This was the most ridiculous thing I’d ever heard.

“Sure! With a cat like me you get two for the price of one. Twice the killer instinct, twice the fatal attraction, and of course… twice the six-pack.”

“Two six-packs. Really.”

“Hey—Maxie can count! Congratulations, buddy!”

Brutus was obviously his usual obnoxious self again. I should have been thrilled but I wasn’t. I preferred Brutus when he was down and out for the count. At least he wasn’t as insufferable as he was now.

“So to tell you the truth I don’t know what you guys are doing here. I told Odelia I can handle this and I can!”

We were in Odelia and Chase’s room, where Odelia was currently holed up in bed, pretending to be fast asleep. I wasn’t entirely sanguine about the whole setup, and Brutus babbling on and on didn’t make me feel any better about it.

“Can you guys please be quiet?” finally asked Odelia. “You’re going to scare her off.”

“Action hero,” Brutus whispered, pointing to himself. “Pussy,” he added, giving me a final prod. “No offense, buddy.”

“None taken,” I muttered.

Time crept by ever so slowly, and I had the feeling we’d been there for hours and hours already.

“I have to tinkle,” said Harriet suddenly. “Can I go tinkle?”

“Of course you can go tinkle,” said Odelia. “But make it quick.”

Harriet hopped off the bed.

“I have to go, too,” said Dooley. “Can I go, too?”

“Oh, Dooley,” said Odelia with a sigh.

The unfortunate thing was that Gran, due to space constraints, had only brought along a single litter box. And since she hadn’t really paid a lot of attention she’d simply grabbed the first one she saw, which, of course, was Harriet’s. And since Harriet is always very prissy about her litter box, now each time we wanted to go we had to ask her permission.

“Harriet, can I go tinkle?!” Dooley yelled.

“Yes, but only if you tinkle inside the box,” Harriet yelled back. “No tinkling on the carpet. And don’t you dare tinkle on the side of the box! No spillage!”

“I never tinkle on the side,” said Dooley.

I sometimes tinkle on the side, but that’s because I’m so big. Hey, it’s not that I have bad aim, but they make these litter boxes awfully small.

Harriet returned and gave Dooley a censorious look.“Don’t tinkle on my tinkle spot,” she warned him. “That tinkle spot is my tinkle spot alone.”

“Yes, Harriet,” he said dutifully.

And of course when one cat has to go, they all have to go, so the moment Dooley returned it was my turn to go, quickly followed by Brutus.

“I think I need to go number two,” Brutus said.

“No way,” Harriet said. “Hold it in.”

“I can’t!”

“Odelia!” Harriet cried. “Please change the litter in my litter box as soon as Brutus is done.”

“I’m not going to change the litter in your litter box each time one of you does number two,” said Odelia, starting to sound as if she was in a bad mood.

“Then you should have brought more than one litter box,” said Harriet.

“I didn’t even invite you guys here!” said Odelia. “This was all your idea!”

“Oh, for crying out loud, will you stop bickering!” a voice sounded from inside the wall.

It was Gran.

“I’m getting rheumatism from sitting on this chair for so long and I’m going deaf from all the bickering. When is this killer going to show her face?!”

“I’m not even sure she will show her face!” Odelia yelled back.

“I’m going to bed,” said Gran. “This is ridiculous.”